I’ve learned that everyone needs something to hang on to that keeps them from losing their mind. Perhaps you might say DUH! but truly this is a lesson that I have not only learned the hard way but only learned to accept over the last 1,777 days. This something can be anything really as long as it has long, deep tethers to your soul. This is the something that keeps your nose above water, your feet on the ground, your eyes opened and your will to keep going. This something tucks your smile away when you drop it so when you are actually looking for it, you have it. The something that reminds you to take a breath in when you forget that you need to and the something that reminds you that you are human and no one is perfect. The something that brings you back to center when you wobble…and believe me I wobble!
To have that “something” in your life is a gift. I believe everyone has it even if they haven’t discovered it yet. It’s the something that makes you better and makes you keep trying to improve and it’s the thing that must be accepted as needed. I come from many years of not admitting that I need things. I never come first, I will make due with what I have so others have what they need. I would NEVER, before these 1,777 days, admit that I needed anything nor would I ask for help or say the C word- can’t. Can’t is weakness and weakness is a flaw that I choose not to “have” despite the fact that I do have weaknesses and in fact I do need things. I would just never admit it… but there is one thing (ok, three) that I DO need and they are the something that everyone needs to propel them through life.
My somethings are my kids. They make me get up in the morning. I can’t wait to talk to them about everything that happens every day and I miss them terribly when they are not around. My kids are my batteries, they make me go. They are the reasons that I found the courage to run when things in my world plummeted to hell. They make me want to be a better person and they make me want to try harder in everything I do. They lift me up so high and make me so proud of who they are and how amazing and wonderful they have turned out to be, each in their own special and unique way. They are the very breath that I take in and the life in my body. I love them so.
With every step I take on the road, even when I can’t go every day, I try my best to be my best because I would expect it of them and I know they expect me to live up to my own expectations of them. They make me see things in a half full way. I don’t shy away from rain running because it’s just an inconvenience not a problem. I run when it’s cold because fresh air is good for the soul and layers fix chilly runs. I run in the dark because I feel fast and invincible. I run often because my legs work and I can. I run through it when I feel like my legs are lead or I’m struggling for breath because there are those who cannot run. I run in the heat because I sweat more and work harder. I run I run I run because my children are right there with me cheering me on telling me to press on because I can do it. I run because my “somethings” are with me. They dragged me along in my head and heart and soul….not letting me give in when I wanted to quit this funny ride called life. They are ever present and all encompassing to me and with every beat of my heart I fill with joy knowing I am the luckiest person in the world to know such wonderfully inspiring people.
In life we all need a something. People, things or even thoughts that propel us. I have been propelled through jobs, experiences and even half marathons which I remember telling a co-worker that I would never ever do. I have done these things because my somethings were nudging me along. I can do anything with my somethings. With my somethings I am amazingly strong willed and successful. My somethings make me happy. My somethings keep me grounded and they always keep me striving to be my best. Find your something and life will never get you down!