2017 · brenna gimler · Cold Running · Discipline · Hard Running · Hills · Pace · Rain Running

Can You Dwell On Things You’ll Never Know?

So my question right now is “can you reasonably guestimate what would have happened if you made different choices?” That’s my thought process today. Today my legs feel like I would expect them to the day after a half marathon. Tired but not painfully achy and a slight bit of discomfort in my hips but nothing to cry about. The question I ponder is whether or not I should be thanking my new CW-X pants for feeling good today or not. I bought them so I would have extra support for the race. Support I had, the compression is great but the expectation I had for after the race was sorely short met. I expected my legs to feel great and to not have pain in my hips or knees or surprisingly the backs of my legs. That particular problem tells me I need new shoes so I will make that purchase soon. The question is however, did my new tights do their job or not? Would my legs feel worse today if I hadn’t worn them? Maybe. But I’ll never know for sure so why think about it?  Was the hilly course the culprit to my ridiculously sore lower extremities? Perhaps but perhaps not. I will never know the answer to this question because it can’t be answered. I cannot relive moments to determine different outcomes.  I suppose I could buy new shoes and run a long run with hills and see how I feel to test that theory. My watch didn’t save my time from the race so I won’t know my own pace.  It isn’t really different from the official time but I like to see the time on my watch because it tells me how much actual running time I had without stops or potty breaks.  This race, I may have run too fast but I don’t think so. I was texting my sons at every mile and it was averaging 10 minute miles. That’s not too fast and I don’t think it’s too fast with hills. Again, I will never know the answer to that. According to my official time of 2:21:15 I had a 10:47 average pace time. Overall that’s discouraging to me, but I did walk several times and I stopped to pee once. So no, I am not happy that I was putting up nearly an 11 minute mile throughout the race but it’s not shocking to me either because I wasn’t trying to run fast. I was trying to finish and at the end of the day who cares anyway except for me. Nobody that’s who. I’ll never know what could have been different, all I can do is change different things and see what the differences are. I won’t bad mouth my new pants because it’s possible that they actually did their job. I’ll use them again because the compression was very good. I won’t dwell on things, just change what I know needs to be changed and move on to the next thing. That’s life!  I think that the think I liked least was that I felt unprepared for a race that in all actuality I was very ready for.  I felt tired and old and wondering what the hell I thought I was doing signing up for that race anyway.  The audacity of my having signed up for another race at certain points in the race seemed rather audacious to me.  Pretty bold to do is what I thought as I was increasingly disappointed in myself for feeling so unprepared as I did for 13.1 miles.  I don’t feel that way anymore but yesterday I did.  I felt like everything wasn’t aligned properly, causing me to stumble through the race.  Although I finished it felt like a messy finish that needed cleaning up.  Again, a disappointment that was only temporary to the situation.  Today of course I’m looking at races for 2018 so how badly could I feel anyway right?  All we can do is move on and that’s exactly what I’ll be doing!

HAPPY RUNNING!

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