I wonder if dropping your child off at college can be correlated to the likeness of getting used to running & life’s firsts? Is it like Mary Poppins sings “just a spoon full of sugar ….”? I think not. In fact I think that there is no amount of sugar that makes it better! It’s one of those things that you just have to adjust to. Let me explain what it’s like to drop your child off at college:
- The first time is horrible and you hope to never do it again! Like pushing your first baby out after they tell you how it’s too late for drugs and you look around for a plunger to get that kid out and put yourself out of misery because THEY aren’t doing enough to help you get OUT of pain (sadists!)
- The minute it’s over you think about how you made it through and feel like a champion. Yeah, that’s when you talk about baby 2 & 3 and how you really want lots of kids. Clearly not thinking anything through thoroughly and your brain is seemingly on effing vacation!
- You get happy when you think about the next time and you feel all warm and fuzzy and optimistic….WAIT FOR IT!
- That day comes and you ARE in fact happy and optimistic UNTIL it’s “go time” and you wonder what the HELL you were thinking trying to brave this again. This is about the time the profanity starts in between silent sobs under your sunglasses so no one can see that you’re not ok. Yeah, my cheeks sweat too ladies and gents but only when we drop Johnny off.
- So you masochistically brave it again and this time isn’t AS horrible…. but still horrible like road rash when you fall descending a hill (yeah, OUCHIE!)
- You wonder whether you need therapy for self inflicted pain syndrome but decide that it might be normal and decide to wait it out and see how it goes this time. Kind of like the people in the horror flicks that KNOW the killer is in that room but their curiosity just gets the best of them. Yeah sign me up!
- Anyway, you make it through and start to think that everything will be ok as you settle into what becomes your new normal.
Your new normal…. a bit abrasive to begin but instead of destroying you, it begins to improve you. As you improve so do those you surround yourself with including the child you feel like you abandoned because you become positive and positive replaces sad and skeptical. Happy replaces laying on the couch feeling like you are never going to feel happy again. The sun does come out and Life goes on. Life has just taken a sharp left turn onto this new road of improvement and you begin to feel like you’re stronger and better in many ways. Change always takes time and determination and adjustment. With Faith everything is always ok.